It turns out that how you fake undereye concealer is, um, probably the opposite of whatever i did. Which i just noticed as I sit here in the car outside the school guzzling tea and getting ready to go in.
I think it is time to revisit my makeup shills and put function labels in all the tubes. In big letters.
(Edited because autocorrect does not love me. Sitting in a vat outside the school would be an entirely different kind of day.)